depressionnap | expiation inbox

You said to wait a week.

that i did

you wish to meet, then?

Yes.

do you have a preference for location

No.
Wherever you think is most suitable.

go to the casino
i will request a private room for us

[ quietly reevaluating his initial thought that vincent isn't a wall market thug-- ]

The casino. Very well, I'll be there shortly.

[no he just plays queen's blood there a lot sob]

i will wait for you inside at the foyer

[ nerd.

anyway, sephiroth's used his week well, since he's taken the time to get familiar with the area. he finds his way to the casino in short order, stepping into the foyer and toward heading toward vincent in record time.

he's still uniformed, more or less, but at least he's lost the armor and coat. it has the unfortunate effect of making him look even smaller than he is (... seriously, how does he wind up growing like a foot and a half in just a few years??), but at least he seems less.. on edge. maybe. ]

.. Sir.

[mako and jenova cells are megasteroids that's probably how

Vincent waits patiently, dressed as he always does. His arms are folded, and his gaze is toward the door. There are a number of things on his mind -- Cloud, Tifa, and Aerith are gone now, and that is something he must accept -- but as Sephiroth walks through the door, his focus becomes entirely on the teenager.]

Just Vincent is fine.

[He turns and beckons Sephiroth to follow with his hand before he goes to approach the stairs, guiding the young SOLDIER to a private room.]

...How... was your week?

[ his gains will be incredible.

'just vincent'.. well, alright. it's not so different from addressing teammates. still, vincent gets a slightly puzzled look at the question. maybe he wants a report to see that sephiroth is using his time productively..? ]

Illuminating, [ he settles on after a few moments of consideration. ] I took the time to familiarize myself with the city, and spent some time in the city center's library to learn what I can of this world and its history and culture. I've also kept up with my training as best I can. [ he hesitates, then adds a little uncertainly: ] Though.. I'm not sure that my skills are very useful here.

There are fiends here. Your skills will come into play before you know it.

[It sounds like a field report. It isn't quite what he asked, but he can understand why Sephiroth answers the way he does. It'll do, so he nods once.

Vincent folds his arms, gazing down at Sephiroth.]

But let us discuss what you came here for.

[ he certainly hopes so. otherwise, he's not quite certain what to do with himself. he wasn't prepared for a life outside military service.

but vincent brings up the subject of their meeting on his own, and sephiroth's shoulders straighten, face tilting up to meet bright scarlet eyes as he struggles not to drop into parade-rest. ]

Yes. You said you'd tell me who you are and what you did for Shinra.

...Yes.

You have full permission to ask me anything you wish, Sephiroth. I will answer you truthfully. Even if... they are things that don't sound as if they would be true. I will understand.

[If nothing else, Vincent needs to try. If he can somehow help him now as he is... would it mean that he can save at least one version of Lucrecia's son? One in the sea of thousands of possibilities, but better than zero.]

A long time ago, I was once a Turk. I imagine I don't need to explain to you who they are.

[ .. ah. he thought as much. still, why is he being so agreeable? if anyone would understand what sephiroth is, it would be a turk. property of shinra doesn't get to ask questions.

and.. why has he never seen him before? if he'd left when sephiroth was a child, or even before, it makes no sense for him to feel any sort of obligation to him.. does it?

he frowns, brows knitting. ] Were you assigned to me when I was a child? I don't remember you. [ why would they have assigned a turk to guard him, anyway? ]

You would have no reason to know my face or my name. I was never assigned to you directly.

[Eventually, he will tell the truth. Vincent doesn't aim to be coy, but he wants to let Sephiroth exhaust all of his questions first.]

But you were.. indirectly. [ that seems to be what he's implying, anyway. ] You.. had something to do with the research that was used to make me.. what I am?

[ he doesn't know much about his history, but he does know that the supersoldier project that had enhanced him had been in existence for quite some time.

if vincent had been involved before sephiroth was born, then.. ]

Did you know Jenova, my mother? I-- [ is that possible? he shouldn't get his hopes up, he knows, but he has so little of her. ] I had a locket with her photograph in it, but it-- [ glenn had thrown it away. ] --it's not here anymore.

[There is only one way that Sephiroth would have a photograph of his mother, and it would be because of Hojo. In turn, that means Hojo told Sephiroth that his mother in that photograph was Jenova. Rage fills his heart; of course that man would do something like this, to continue to make this child his speciman.

Vincent breathes in deeply, closing his eyes. None of that is Sephiroth's fault. It's difficult, not having an easy way to vent out that anger as he feels the Galian Beast's blood boil in his veins.

Red eyes look down to Sephiroth.]

I was assigned to your mother as a bodyguard. I... knew her well.

[ his face lights up before he can stop it, the hope naked on his expression. he batters it back down with effort, smoothing his expression as best he can. after all, there's no telling if this is the truth-- and even if it is, despite what vincent said, he could always decide not to tell sephiroth anything else. ]

Her bodyguard? But.. the Professor said.. [ he trails off, suddenly troubled. ] So she was part of Shinra? [ had she known what would be done to him? had she just.. left him there? ]

[The look on Sephiroth's face causes his fury to evaporate for now. Furious as he is with Hojo, ultimately it is most important that Sephiroth is given the truth, however much he will choose to believe.]

...Hojo will say about anything if it is to his own interests in doing so. I suggest you take his words with a grain of salt, if even that.

Your mother was a scientist, working to study an important subject with Professor Hojo. She was the person I admired and respected most, dedicated and working even when she should have been resting.

[ a scientist. she was a scientist, like the professor. so.. she had to have known, surely. does that mean that she'd abandoned him in the professor's hands? is she still working for shinra out there somewhere? does she care about him? .. had she ever?

or maybe-- from the sound of it, maybe she'd died. which possibility is the worst in this case?

chest feeling tight, he slowly sinks into one of the seats, gloved hands curling into fists on his knees. ]

Did she.. not want me? Where is she? [ a ragged little breath escapes him, aching. he feels more wounded than he'd thought. ] Who is my father? [ does he even have one? ]

[Slowly, Vincent approaches and sinks into a kneel in front of Sephiroth after the boy sits. The last question has always tormented him, because he knows that the two possibilities end with a terrible answer no matter wat. So, he remains truthful.]

I don't know who your father is.

[That's out of the way at least. Vincent is at a loss of how best to handle this, but he wants to give Sephiroth the information he has been denied all of his life.]

For as much as she was dedicated to her projects, your mother was not a heartless woman, Sephiroth. And much of her influence was drawn by Hojo. [lol no vincent stop putting lucrecia on a pedestal ahhh] I was told that she died giving birth to you. I was... not there myself, as much as I wish I could have been. I tried to find her, and I was never successful. So... it is possible that is what must have happened.

I am... sorry I could not do better by her. Or you.

[ so there had been no hope of finding her from the start. why had the professor lied to him? or is this the lie? it still could be, even if vincent has only been terribly, terrifyingly kind to him from the beginning.

the professor is the one person who's been in his life since the beginning. for better or worse, he's always been there, educating him and answering his questions. can he bear the thought that he's been lying to him all this time? that he's been cruel maybe just for cruelty's sake?

suddenly his head aches, a stinging pain lancing from temple to temple, and he squeezes his eyes shut against vincent's earnest stare. ]

Why-- [ he stops himself when he realizes his voice is trembling, takes several moments to steady himself, then opens his eyes to try again. ] Where have you been? If-- If you were Mother's bodyguard.. what happened? Why did you leave?

[The tremor in his voice is heartbreaking. It gives him the urge to reach out, as if Vincent could somehow be comforting -- but it is a foolish idea. After all, this boy's pain is as much Vincent's fault as it is Hojo's. This is, too, can be applied to his many sins.]

It was not my choice to leave her, or you. I was... forced away, when I expressed my concerns about your mother and you, when you were not yet born.

Suffice it to say, Hojo did not approve of my confrontation. I will spare you the gruesome details of the ordeal, but I remained indisposed for a long time.

[ .. oh. that-- he's seen the professor's wrath first-hand, when dealing with people that oppose him. maybe it's a miracle that vincent is even here at all. maybe it's safer this way.

it really sounds as if he'd cared for sephiroth's mother. had he loved her? had she cared for him, too? would sephiroth's life have been different if vincent had remained at her side? she might have left shinra, if so, as impossible as that seems. maybe she would have raised him, and vincent would have been there as.. he doesn't know. family, maybe?

(family..? could he really have had something like that?)

he hesitates for several moments, feeling strange and dizzy and bewildered. his head still aches, his throat tight, eyes hot. his mother.. is gone, and there's no hope of finding her. he's never going to have that relationship. but vincent's still here, kneeling in front of him, like sephiroth really matters to him. whether that's because of sephiroth's mother or not.. does that mean anything? he's still here.

he hesitates, then uncurls one hand, reaching up to cautiously nudge unruly dark hair aside, leaving vincent's face and expression more visible. ]

I'm sorry, [ he ekes out eventually, eyes searching the older man's. ] That-- That you were hurt trying to help us. I'm glad that I've had the chance to meet you. [ his hand falls away again, teeth catching the inside of his cheek. ] Can you.. tell me about her?

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